Main Series Protagonists Edit

Cryptosporidium Edit

Cryptosporidium, known as Crypto for short, is the main character in the series. A member of an alien species known as Furons he is an anti-hero who enjoys wreaking havoc and destroying all humans. Crypto's boss is Orthopox 13, who usually gives Crypto missions. Sometimes Crypto talks with a variety of wise-cracking remarks. He once notes that he is aiding a lot of humans, and says "I thought the game was called Destroy All Humans". Voiced by J. Grant Albrecht.

Crypto's clones

Cryptosporidium-136 - Crypto 137's clone, often referred to as Crypto 137's brother, who is sent to Earth for a mission similar to 137's, collecting human brain stems. Unfortunately, Crypto 136 met an untimely end at the hands of human scientists: sacrificed and dissected in the name of science. Crypto is enraged when he discovers this, and his hatred for humans becomes personal. He presumably had the same personality as 137, as Crypto refers to him as 'me' sometimes (often confusing himself). Crypto-136 was the pilot of Furon scoutship sent by his boss Orthopox-13 find a planet that Furons visited many eons ago, a planet that was ripe with pure and more complete DNA. But while trying to land on Area-42 (Reference to Area-51), a missile hits his ship. His ship crashed and he was taken by the Military and Majestic for experimentation. Silhouette, the leader of Majestic-12, oversaw these events herself and was responsible for his death. He was later given an autopsy.

Cryptosporidium-137 - Wise-cracking, Jack Nicholson-esque protagonist of the game. He has an unlimited amount of clones that will take his place if he dies during a mission, all of which have the same personality, but an increasing number appended to their name (Crypto 138, Crypto 139, and so on). His name comes from the Cryptosporidium protist. He likes destroying things, and uses one-liners a lot. He was the successor of Crypto-136, created even when Crypto-136's fate was still unknown. Crypto-137 was the first Furon on Earth for over a million years. In chronological order, Crypto-137 had many notable accomplishments. He destroyed an army taskforce in an American mid-western farm, in Rockwell he destroyed the Annual Rockwell Fair, assassinated and posed (by Holobobbing) as the Mayor. In Santa Modesta he assassinated the Mayor, destroyed several population food controlled diners controlled by Majestic, killed Sleepy Ernst, then destroyed the Santa Modesta Majestic base. He discovered the fate of Crypto-136 in Area 42, he also blew up Area 42 with a nuclear weapon, as well as blew up the Area 42 Majestic Base with his saucer. He was shot down and captured in Union Town, but soon escaped and destroyed the Union Town Majestic Base. He later visited Capitol City, assassinated the President, he then returned to Union Town and posed as the Navy leader and stopped Silhouette's plan to lead all five divisions of National Defense. Just after that he destroyed General Armquist. He later destroyed Roboprez (the brain of President Huffman put in a 50 foot tall robot) and killed Silhouette. After that he permanently holobobbed the President and posed as him until his mysterious death between 1959 and 1969. Which Crypto-138, then continued to pose as the President. He was also the cause of thousands of human casualties, plus the death of several cows and chickens.

Cryptosporidium-138 - Was the President until 1969, when the mothership was destroyed by a KGB missile. His notable achievements include: Saving Bay City from a nuclear bomb, killing Coyote Bongwater, destroying 'the rock' (a KGB base). In Albion, he killed Oranchov, met Reginald Ponsonby-Smythe. He also met Natayla Ivanova, a former KGB agent. Later saves Albion form the deadly poison spores. Was betrayed by Ponsonby, but was rescued by Natayla, then killed Ponsonby. He then went to Takoshima where he destroyed both the evil black ninja and Japanese KGB base. He then saved Japan from Kojira (a Godzilla like nuclear mutated monster). He then left to Tunguska, where he recovered info about Project Solaris, Destroyed a Blisk warship, and discovered a deadly secret, he then rescued Natayla, and flew to the moon, where he killed Milenkov, and saved the Earth from the infectious spores, just after Natyala gets shot in the back and is killed. Later, Crypto is lying around in his saucer with Natayla next to him, Pox says he's seen activity in the cloning pods, Crypto admits he made a few 'changes'. It is also noted that after he defeated the main Blisk Boss he completed an odd job to rid the moon of the remaining blisk survivors.

Cryptosporidium-??? - Little is known about this clone but he appears in multiplayer games as the second player. In the second game he wears a red suit, and in the third game he just has a red arrow floating above his head.

Orthopox Edit

Orthopox, known as Pox by for short, is Crypto's commander, who gives him his assignments. Pox is an intelligent Furon scientist who likes to experiment on Furon DNA, and is the second most senior fleet commander in the entire Furon Navy. Pox is the mastermind behind the expedition to retrieve the Furon DNA from Human brainstems. His achievements: Conqueror of Zarkon-5, Hero of the Battle of Tharsis Mons, Winner of the Xanthrax-47 Mental Cruelty Award 6 years running. Having been destroyed at the beginning of Destroy All Humans! 2, Pox's mind has been confined to a HoloPox unit, a Furon hologram projector that he developed himself, which he managed to download his conscious into before the mothership exploded. Voiced by Richard Steven Horvitz.

Other Characters Edit

DAH! Edit

General Armquist - Leader of the American military, out to destroy all Furons (which he believes are stunted Communists). He walks with a slight limp on his right side. His mannerisms seem to be a parody of those of Joseph McCarthy. Voiced by John Cygan.

Silhouette - Shadowy masked figure who seems to be leading Majestic against the Furons. Not much is known about this person, only that Silhouette is a female sexist who wants to dominate the world. She is also very agile, which is shown in the opening cutscene of the final level and during the final boss battle. Voiced by Nika Futterman.

Bert Wither - Respected Ukrainian radio newscaster, used by the Furons because of the influence he has over people. With Orthopox tracking his broadcasts throughout the game, he also serves as an informant of sorts. Voiced by Jim Ward.

President Huffman - The President of the United States. Not much is revealed about him in the game, although if the player manages to scan him, his thoughts are revealed to be somewhat sadistic. Most likely based on the Reverend William Huffman who was an alleged witness to the 1941 "UFO Crash" in Cape Girardeau, Missouri. Voiced by Andre Sogliuzzo.

Sleepy Ernst - A scientist in the employ of Majestic and a popular TV personality, Ernst suffers from narcolepsy. He is voiced by Bob Joles.

Mayor - Two mayors are seen in the game: the mayor of Rockwell and the mayor of Santa Modesta. In both towns, the mayor is a popular politician who is instrumental in Crypto's plans. Voiced by Jim Ward.

Miss Rockwell - She appears only in the level, "Earth Women Are Delicious", at Rockwell, and her real name isn't given. In the mission where she is present, Crypto must find a human that is unintelligent and probe them to understand humans.

DAH!2 Edit

Natalya Ivanova - was a KGB agent whom went rogue after strange things begin to happen. She allies with Crypto in order to save both their species from Milenkov and the Blisk. Voiced by Courtenay Taylor.

Arkvoodle, Lord of the Sacred Crotch - An ancient Furon God who came to Earth thousands of years ago. Statues dedicated to him are scattered throughout the world and act as landing zones for Crypto's saucer. Crypto has founded several cults around the world in his honor, as Crypto himself has come to embody a Furon prophecy about the second coming of Arkvoodle due to his newly acquired genitalia (leading to the nickname, "Lord of the Sacred Crotch"). Arkvoodle also has a pet: an ancient Furon Subterranean creature called the Burrow Beast, which can be summoned to eat enemies from below. The Burrow Beast is extremely similar to the graboids from Tremors.[2] Voiced by Jim Ward.

Shama Llama - A hippie that Crypto rescues from the Bay City police, Shama Llama goes on to become the apostle for and manager of Crypto's worldwide Arkvoodle cults. After becoming too cocky and declaring himself the leader of the Arkvoodle cult, Crypto kills him for insubordination. The newspaper that announces his death states that he is likely to be replaced by son of Sleepy Ernst from Destroy All Humans!. He has an Indian accent.[2]

The Freak - A Bay City hippie who knows practically everything that goes on there, due to [[rad messages he picks up with his teeth. Thanks to drugs, he has a hard time recalling anything useful. He's a skilled artist that ends up designing posters for the Arkvoodle cult.[2]

Coyote Bongwater - A hippie commune leader dedicated to overthrowing "the man" and the creator of Revelade. Initially working with the KGB to accomplish this, he regrets this decision when he finds out they have betrayed him and actually want to destroy America outright. Crypto subsequently assassinates Bongwater, halting any other plans he might have had and ending the hippie rebellion.[2]

Agent Ivan Oranchov - The lead KGB agent in America. He betrays Bongwater and leaves him for dead in an attempt to use nuclear bombs to destroy Bay City. He is later killed by Crypto after he is infected with spores and turns into a Blisk mutant.[2]

Dr. Go! - A Takoshimese scientist that knows much about the KGB and Black Ninjas. He is allied with the White Ninjas and Crypto.[2] Voiced by Yuri Lowenthal.

Agent Sergei - Natalya's former lover who provides information for her, Crypto hates him because of his own feelings for Natalya. Sergei, however, does not share Crypto's hatred; contrarily, he understands Crypto's feelings for Natalya, but looks down on him as though he were a young child. After being infected with Blisk spores, Sergei is never heard from again.[2]

Gastro - The janitor (and cook) aboard the mothership, he downloaded himself onto a HoloPox Unit, like Pox, to survive. Later found as a datacore and used as a weapon. He apparently had a large collection of Furon folk music before the attack on the Mothership. Gastro speaks in third person, is cocky, and looks highy to Pox and Crypto.[2] Voiced by Phil Morris.

SGT. Fauxhall - A military sergeant who has Crypto do a couple of jobs for him, like capturing Clayton Cartwell Jr. (an AWOL hippie who wants to avoid the draft) and kill a rogue military soldier, Private Mendaza who is selling bazooka crates to the KGB. All is well for Fauxhall until a KGB agent tells a disguised Crypto to kill him and retrieve the bazooka crates.[2]

The White Ninja Leader - The leader of the White Ninjas. He and his group originally wanted to be black but the other ninjas put their order in first when grey was no longer being made. This sparked a war between them. The White Ninja Leader and his men worship Furons and are the "good guys" of the ninjas. He seems to be a little eccentric, judging from the fact that he kidnapped a girl from the super market and was going to sacrifice her, and thinks it's okay because of what Crypto did to Miss Rockwell in the first game.[2]

The Black Ninja Leader - The Black Ninja Leader and his men ignited the war between them and the white ninjas by putting their order in first for black clothing when grey was not made anymore. He and his men are in league with the KGB and are the "bad guys" of the ninjas. They attack civilians, cops and the Military. The Black Ninja Leader is the person who orders a disguised Crypto to kill Shama Llama.[2] Voiced by Steven Blum.

Yamanosuke Hirotaro - Leader of the West Yakuza. To differ from the rest of the West Yakuza, Hirotaro wears a peace sign on his suit. He gives a disguised Crypto one mission to lure Kenji Mojo, leader of the East Yakuza into a trap, because Kenji said "His wife was prettier than Yamanosuke's." However, because of a West Yakuza snitch, Kenji Mojo isn't killed, yet. Hirotaro orders Crypto to kill the snitch, but he still wouldn't feel better. After Crypto kills the snitch, he goes to a KGB agent disguised as one himself to be told to kill both Yamanosuke Hirotaro & Kenji Mojo.[2]

Kenji Mojo - Leader of the East Yakuza. When Kenji Mojo tells Yamanosuke Hirotaro his wife was prettier than Tojo's, Hirotaro, enraged, orders a disguised Crypto to call Kenji to come to a meeting with him as a set up to kill Kenji. But Kenji is one step ahead of his nemesis, because a West Yakuza traitor tells Kenji the entire plan and he escapes death. The West Yakuza traitor however, is killed by Crypto because he was rat. When Crypto gets a mission from a KGB agent to kill the 2 Yakuza leaders, Kenji Mojo, along with Yamanosuke Hirotaro is killed.[2]

Prudence Kane - Prudence is Coyote Bongwater's girlfriend who tries to get everyone to love Revelade because she firmly believes that Revelade will change the nation. She can be killed while the only time she is there after her Revelade meeting.[2] Voiced by Courtenay Taylor.

Other Furons - In one of the Bay City missions the player can communicate with other Furons besides Pox. This can be done by transmitting a telephone call which is picked up by a non-helpful Furon working at Space Traffic Control who Pox insults. The call is then picked up by the Furon Admiral, Cyclosporasis, who denies Pox any assistance. Pox is infuriated by this and the Admiral hangs up.[2]

Big Willy Unleashed Edit

Colonel Kluckin - He's one third used-car salesman, one third Texas politician, and one third big-top ringmaster, all rolled up into a crazy business tycoon that Boss Hogg would be proud of. He may be a shrewd businessman bent on dominating the fast food world and is the one who finds out the secret recipe. After many scuffles and run ins with Crypto, he faces his nemesis in Vietmahl in a mechanical version of a rain forest god and subsequently, he is killed as Crypto (in his Big Willy robot) managed to destroy his robot after the intense battle. Voiced by Bill Farmer.

Patty Wurst - Fashion Supermodel billionaire heiress, turned militant activist anarchist, Patty Wurst has flair for metaphorical vagaries and misguided social causes. The character bares a resemblance to the life story of Patty Hearst.[3] She is defeated by Crypto in his Big Willy robot going against him in a giant combat tank. Voiced by Courtenay Taylor.

Mr. Pork - This benevolent owner of Fantasy Atoll has a special medallion made that protects him from Furon weaponry, and also a tall, and faithful, assistant named Ratpoo. Pork is defeated after the death of Ratpoo and the destruction his battleship, the "Hate Boat". Voiced by Jim Ward.

Mindy Peters - Mindy is the leader of a gang of roller blading girls armed with Furon D-rays. She also has diamond studded brass-knuckles, and her disco ball can hypnotize even the strongest Furon mind. She is vaporized after Crypto disguises himself as an attractive human male (known as the Corncob King) and leads her to her doom.

Toxoplasma Gondii - A snobby bureaucrat and Furon Efficiency Expert who hails from the Furon homeworld, Gondii puts Crypto through a series of tests designed to prove Crypto's invasion skills while at the same time breaking his spirit. When it is eventually discovered that Gondii is a fraud, posing as an efficiency expert and trying to get Crypto's spirits down so that he can take his place, Crypto and Pox seize the chance to destroy him, and notify Gorta, so that his next clone would be transferred to Gorta's Prison Moon.

Blastomycosis (Blasto for short) - A Furon child with some human features. Little is known about him, except that when Crypto is doing certain jobs, he makes his appearance, showing an ion detonator in his hands and firing a bomb from the detonator to blast a human or a group of humans before taking off. It is later discovered that Blasto was, in fact, the son of Cryptosporidium and Natalya Ivanova. This revealed Crypto and Natalya did had sex in the end of the b-movie in Destroy All Humans! 2. Voiced by Phil Morris.